Thursday, July 3, 2008

Why Can't My Mom Let ME Be The Mom??

I don't know if the rest of you would agree with me or not, but in my own personal experience, when it comes to being the "baby" of the family, you're never really allowed to grow up. I think it's quite strange, actually. Here I am, a week shy of turning 45-years-old, and my mom and my five siblings still treat me like I'm only 10-years-old sometimes. It's completely frustrating, to say the least. The only justification I can figure out for this strange behavior is that if they admit that I'M getting older, they'll have to admit that THEY are too (and maybe face their own mortality?).

Who knows?

The only thing I'm sure of is that it can be extremely exasperating sometimes, especially when my mother INSISTS that she knows what's okay for my kids to eat and what isn't. That's why, on the mornings when she comes up to sit with my youngest so I can run my oldest daughter off to school, she does things like coming up armed with POCKETS FULL of candy for my little one. Yeah... just what I wanted her to have... 25 gazillion Tootsie Rolls at 8:00 in the morning! Yep, that's a well-balanced, nutritious breakfast, isn't it? I know it makes the Cheerios and grapes I've given her look like swill!

I keep telling this woman (who, mind you, has developed a completely different set of values as a grandmother than she had as a mom, that's for sure!) that I DO NOT want her giving my little one gum. Ever since I can remember, my mother has always had a never-ending supply of Wrigley's Doublemint in her purse. And, she thinks nothing of freely handing my 3-year-old a piece whenever she asks for it. Problem is, my 3-year-old doesn't understand that gum is to be chewed, NOT swallowed! I keep trying to explain to my mother that there's research that supports the fact that gum takes up to SEVEN years to fully digest once it's swallowed. But, I neglect to remember the fact that to her, I'm still only 10, and I couldn't POSSIBLY know what I'm talking about. Ugh.

This morning, however, my distain towards my little one having gum rose to a MUCH higher level. She crawled into bed between my husband and me, and gave my husband a hug and a kiss good morning. When it was my turn to get my morning squishes and smooches, I reached up and stroked her hair as she was pulling away from me, only to find my hand completely caught in an enormous snarl as she continued to back away. I skooched up to see what could possibly be causing this huge knot, and.... you guessed it... it was a hunk of GUM!!!

So, there I was, half asleep, my eyes barely focused, and I had to face the less-than-pleasant task of trying to free my daughter's beautiful, LONG hair from the snare of the Doublemint gum that had balled itself up in there. The worst part is, there were sections I just could not free without causing her excruciating pain. So... I had to cut some. CUT SOME!!!! I don't know who was sobbing more over this terrible act, my daughter or me. I've done nothing but give her teeny tiny trims on the bottom of her hair since she was born, and here I was, putting a pair of scissors to her hair about three inches from the bottom!!! Not only was I crying; I was fuming!!

The good news is, I only had to cut a tiny little portion out, and as of right now, you can barely notice it missing from her hair. I don't know what it's going to look like after her bath, though. I pray that it doesn't look so horrible that I have to have it all cut to even it out.

The BAD news is, I'm willing to bet you anything you have that's valuable that even this won't stop my mother from giving my daughter what she wants. After all, what do I know? I'm barely out of diapers myself!


Erica said...

I remember getting peanut butter in my hair for gum... not fun.

Poor kiddo.

I don't like gum much...scares me when my 4 year old gets a hold of some as I don't want him chewing it yet.

Mama C. said...

Well, obviously, my mom has a very different opinion than you and I share. She thinks it's nothing to hand a toddler some!

I keep asking her, "Who are you, and what have you done to my mother?"!!!!

Erica said...

that's rather funny, "what have you done with my mother?"

Karyn said...

Um... I guess I'm bad. I gave a 19 month old gum. But then, said toddler FOUND it in my bag and started to eat it. She did rather well, and when she was done gave me back the chewed gum.

Does it really take 7 years to digest? I can't see HOW it stays in the stomach though... you'd think it would keep pooped out before digested, like a penny.

Rebecca said...

Oh I can relate too. My mom has gotten worse lately with suckers and candy past bed time and promises to go in the hot tub after dinner - all without checking with me first of course! I think it's time I sit down with her and tell her "my rules" before it gets worse.

And thanks for commenting on my blog. I love to sew for my kids especially because I get to see what I made over and over again. I have no interest at this time to sell anything since my daughters have lists of stuff for me to make for them that I can't keep up with!

I've heard of the "popcorn" style quilt you mentioned and heard that it's quite easy and a great way to use up scraps. My suggestion would be to google it and find someone who's put the instructions online somewhere. Good luck!

Mama C. said...

I tried Googling it, as the name you and I both referred to (popcorn quilting), but couldn't find anything for directions. But, that was awhile ago. Maybe I'll try again... when I'm so inclined to start yet ANOTHER craft project (I've got several in various stages of completion as it is! :).

I wish I were as proficient as you, though. You're amazing! :)


Mama C. said...

Aha!!! I found it, Rebecca!

They're called "Yo Yo" quilts (you'd think a fan of the Osmonds would remember that! ;)

You'd die if you knew what kind of deductive reasoning (with the help from the Worldwide Web, of course!) I used to find that bit of information! :)

Thanks for the suggestion to go actually helped me a lot.


Coastal Granny said...

Hi - No, I don't mind you adding me as a friend. this was the posting that I identified with. I'm going through "mother Issues" right now, too. Not the same but some of the same feelings. And I LOVED your title! My Hubby LOVES to do what your mother did - suger-up the grandkids and then leave. He gets evil pleasure from it. Actually, he was a step-dad and he loves giving my oldest a measure of what she gave him when she was little. Enjoyed your blog and thanks for the note!

Mama C. said...

Well, Paula, you're more than welcome to "stop by" any time you'd like. It's a wonderful thing to find someone who understands exactly what you're going through. I don't know about you, but it makes me feel like I'm NOT so crazy, after all! :)

I'm so glad to "meet" you! :)